A HAPPILY MARRIED MAN

FANNY AND I ARE MARRIED

The day of the wedding, September 1, 1973, at 11:00 A.M, the Church of St. Juan Bosco was filled with friends and family, as I entered the church accompanied by my father and my sister Lilita, I could see and smile to many of my friends, school and classmates, work colleagues and relatives, among them my sisters and brothers. Pepe García, my boss and his wife were there too, and I felt much honored that they were as he had postponed a holiday trip with his family only because he wanted to be with me on this very special day.
Following the tradition, Fanny was taken to the altar by her mother and her husband Aquilino, a man who helped Fanny’s mother to raise her three children since they were very young, with the love and respect of a dedicated and loving real father. Fanny, in her wedding gown was splendidly beautiful as she approached the altar where I was waiting for her, accompanied by my father and my sister Lilita. When Aquilino finally gave her to me and, together with my father and sister quietly walked away from the altar and into their assigned chairs and I was left alone with Fanny, I felt all my blood coming right into my head, out of emotion, out of sense of responsibility, out of happiness and out of love for the, soon to be, my wife. I never felt so unconditionally and undoubtedly sure of what I was doing. I felt extremely happy with myself and with everything around me. All of a sudden, all the doubts I had about getting married had been left behind, all I wanted to do was look forward to having my own family, my wife and children, I have never looked back to regret what I did. That was just the way I wanted to do it!



FANNY AND I AT THE RECEPTION. MY FATHER WAS MY BEST MAN AND MY SISTER LILITA, MY SURROGATE MOTHER

The wedding ceremony took about one hour and included a full mass in which many of the people took the holly communion. Fanny and I promised each other in front of God, the priest and everybody in the church, that we would remain together for the rest of our lives, in poverty as much as in prosperity, in health as much as in illness, in sadness as much as in happiness, and that we would be faithful to each other until we were to be separated by death. I listened each and every one of those words profoundly when I said them as well as when I heard them said by Fanny. Thirty seven years have passed since, and she and I have remained together, loving each other in poverty as in prosperity, in health as in illness, in sadness as much as in happiness, we have loved and have been faithful to each other and are still committed to each other today as much as we were back in September 1, 1973. Fanny and I have three wonderful children, whom we loved and cared much for when they were just young children; and we love them as much today when they are responsible self sufficient professional adults and will love them for as long as we live. We also have two beautiful grand children and expect to have many more, they are the prolongation of our lives, they are the little trees which will grow, become big and leafy and will carry on our heritage, our principles, our love, and, of course, our blood throughout the world, proud of their own selves and proud of their origin, the humble origin from where their forefathers come, but determined to reach out to the world, to reach very high, never ashamed of their roots…

TWO DEAR FRIENDS, FANNY AND I AT THE RECEPTION ROOM
AFTER THE RELIGIOUS CEREMONY

Fanny and I married without much time to prepare for our life together. I can’t say I was a penny wise individual, therefore, I had no savings to draw from, to get our basic things ready for when we got married, that was the first time I had to get credit to buy anything. My sister Lilita was the guarantor for the furniture we bought at a friend’s store on credit; there I bought the essentials for a modest two bedroom apartment we rented not very far from my sister’s. The basic things for the kitchen I was able to buy, but a few other things came from presents we got from friends and family on the wedding day. That is how we started, we didn’t have many things, but we had enough things to start as an independent and happy couple. Fanny was a teacher working for a public school and, though her salary did not make a great contribution to our budget, it helped in the sense that I did not have to worry about her personal expenses. My salary was very good for my age and for my status as a single individual, and once I got to be disciplined in my expenses, it proved to be enough for my new status too. I couldn’t believe it, it was like a miracle, as soon as I got married I was able not only to cover all my expenses as a head of a household, but, much to my own amazement, I was able to save money, for awhile I truly thought that God was repeating with us the miracle of the multiplication of the bread and the fish. The fact of the matter is that we were never short of anything essential, and we were even able to have little luxuries here and there.
About six weeks after we got married, Fanny told me she had started to feel a bit different. “I feel kind of sleepy at work”, she said one day, and added “I also feel like I have a bit of nausea”. I felt a mixture of confusion, anxiety, curiosity, excitement and hope. Confusion because I wasn’t sure if what she had was a symptom of fragile health, or was it just the first symptoms of being pregnant. I felt anxiety because, deep in my mind I was really hoping she was pregnant but at the same time I though it was too early for that, I felt excitement because I really wanted to be a father. And, finally, I was hoping that it wasn’t anything serious with her health but it was what I had been dreaming…we were going to have a child!
Within two weeks our best wishes were confirmed, Fanny was diagnosed as pregnant, and soon after, her tummy started to grow incredibly fast, she had begun to gain a lot of weight, she had a lot of nausea, any time and and anywhere, and, of course, she began to feel the “urgent need for some things to eat”. The first three months of her pregnancy were plagued of all the above. Sometimes she woke me up late at night and asked me to take her to eat “carne en palito” a kind of barbecued meat cooked on charcoal, and served with a little wooden stick like a shishkabab. They used to make it in a place about 20 minutes away from home. It was pathetic, but at the same time it was fun, because I liked living though, and participating in the process of her pregnancy in the day to day, howev er, it wasn’t fun some other times when she was vomiting her carne en palito, right after her late dining session.


FANNY AND SOME OF HER FRIENDS AT THE RECEPTION

Right after the first three months of pregnancy, Fanny started to feel better, the anxiety for eating was gone and the nausea as well. Everything was smooth now; her tummy was growing so fast, it almost grew before my eyes. The bigger her tummy, the more beautiful she looked to me, If anything, I was crazy about the whole thing, I already started to feel like a “father” and we started to talk about the name for the baby. If a boy, he would have my name so he would be a junior, but if it was a girl, Fanny wanted to name her “Maria Auxiliadora” (“Mariuxi”) the name of Virgin Mary in an advocacy of which she was a great devote of. Our discussion centered about the fact that I also wanted to name the baby after my mom, which Fanny did not disagree with, so we would name our baby (if it was a girl) Maria Auxiliadora Lucrecia. We had a deal on the names. In the meantime, Fanny gained 40 pounds by the time she completed her nineth month of pregnancy. Since she is small (5'4), she started to look like a walking ball, and she still was beautiful!
In my next posting: MARIUXI IS BORN